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Sunday, May 16, 2021

Libby’s Corner: Oct. 23

Dear Libby,

I have three clubs all on the same night. It wasn’t a problem earlier in the quarter, but now they’re starting to overlap. What’s worse is that they’re on opposite sides of the campus so I’m running around all night trying to participate in everything but still missing out. How can I make it all work out without having to abandon not only a club, but an entire group of friends?

Sincerely,

Overbooked

Dear Overbooked,

Invest in a hoverboard. I mean, they’re not up to the standards of Back to the Future Day, but it’s a $10,000 investment you won’t regret while you stand in line declaring bankruptcy.

But before you drain your savings, sell all your worldly possessions to impersonate Marty McFly, maybe you just need to slow down and think about your priorities. If you’re not enjoying your activities because you’re pushing to do so many, then it might be time to think about which one you could do without.

Don’t stretch yourself too thin. But seriously, if you can afford a hoverboard, that’d be freaking awesome.

Dear Libby,

My boyfriend lost his job a few weeks ago. He has been pretty lazy about getting a new one. Now, all of a sudden he wants to get a job at the same place I work. THIS CANNOT HAPPEN LIBBY. We already spend so much time together, I think if he got a job at my work then we would be spending way too much time together. How I do I tell him about this without hurting his feelings?

Sincerely,

Soon to be suffocated

Dear Soon to be suffocated,

Tell him it’s a horrible place to work. Tell him it smells like rancid bologna and they make you do trust falls during breaks. Tell him you’re planning on quitting yourself as soon as something better comes along. If worse comes to worse, unplug his alarm clock the day of the interview.

Or if you want to keep your relationship free of sticky, twisty lies, just be honest with him. Say you don’t want to make things stressful by working together and you’d prefer he found something somewhere else.

Dear Libby,

My boyfriend’s family and my family are very different. And usually, it’s not a problem, but sometimes the discrepancies in behavior and tradition put a strain on our relationship. For instance, my grandparents live in Seattle and are in their late 80s. They’re not very mobile and often choose not to be involved with the day-to-day lives of their grandchildren. I’ve come to accept – nay, embrace that this is their lifestyle because it suits them. My boyfriend’s grandparents on the other hand, are in their 60s and are very deeply involved in almost every aspect of the family’s day-to-day activities. It’s not uncommon for my boyfriend to get multiple texts and calls from his grandmother in a day. Different isn’t bad here, but the problem is this: last Christmas, his grandma got me a very nice gift. We’d only been together for about 8 months at that point, and my boyfriend did not receive a gift from my grandparents. I didn’t think anything of it! Now, his grandma has started Christmas shopping for me, and is bouncing ideas off of him. He mentioned it to me, and after I expressed that she really doesn’t have to trouble herself for me, he said something off-handed about how I should feel lucky because he doesn’t even get gifts from my grandparents.

I know he’s joking (probably) but it’s still hurtful. It’s not like I can control what my grandparents do, nor do I feel comfortable forcing him onto their gift-list. I feel bad, but our families are just different and in our family, significant others usually don’t receive family gifts until much later in the relationship.

– Christmas Blues in October

Dear Christmas Blues in October,

Families are tricky beasts, especially those members of the old variety. They come from different times and help shape us as we grow up. You and your boyfriend need to understand that you each come from different backgrounds and your families aren’t going to be identical.

Family is obviously very important to both of you, so it’s important everyone gets along. That being said, it might not always be easy. If your boyfriend is genuinely hurt, talk with him about it. Tell him about your grandparents and that it isn’t anything personal against him, it’s just who they are.  They may not be as active, but it doesn’t mean they don’t care.

If you guys care about each other enough, you can make this work. Your families are part of your lives and therefore, part of the package that comes with a relationship.

Don’t worry, there’s still a few more months until Christmas.

 

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