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Bellingham
Sunday, May 16, 2021

Kathy’s Last Korner

It is with great sadness that we announce that this is Kathy’s last Korner. She has greatly enjoyed her time giving advice to the poor, loveless people all over Bellingham, and thanks you all for going on this journey with her. In the meantime, you can follow her on Twitter (@hatiekeath) or just whisper your love questions into a holiday ham platter- she’ll always be listening.

Kathy,

I am going to dinner with my boyfriend’s parents, and I just lost my job. I don’t want to tell them this because I fear I will disappoint them- what can I say to impress everyone at dinner?

-Mark S.

Mark, I’m not going to sugarcoat this- you may have to recite some small lies, or twist the truth. This isn’t that bad- you’re just exaggerating here, improvising there. I once convinced a date that I modeled for Costco’s annual Kirkland Signature product catalog, when in reality I was asked to leave that photo shoot because I got sick off of all the fake salami and ham assortment I kept forgetting was fake and ultimately vomited into a Men’s Extra Cushion Ankle Sock 6-pack (Assorted Colors.) He doesn’t have to know.

-Kathy

 

Kathy,

Last month, I broke up with my boyfriend of two years. I miss him, but I also want to start enjoying life again. What are some suggestions you have for moving on?

-Kristy R.

 

Kristy, there are a few classic ways to make yourself feel like a new, independent woman. Throw on that mauve Contempo Casuals day-to-night crocheted vest and thrifted denim skort you’ve been saving for a fun night out and let lose with some gal pals! Or do you feel like having a calm night in? Grab a bottle of Pinot! The weight of the bottle will heavy enough to hold down the lid of the to-go box of Olive Garden breadsticks so they won’t get cold while you fall asleep to an episode of Caesar Milan’s The Dog Whisperer. These are just a few small but important things you can treat yourself to in order to start your journey to independence and happiness!

-Kathy

 

Kathy,

We just wanted to let you know how proud we are of you, and how we can’t believe you are graduating this spring. You are a lovely girl who will do BIG THINGS also did you get the pictures of the seal Dad took with the new camera?

P.s. My new favorite song is “Wave” by Mr. Probz please check your phone did you get my voicemail?

                                                            -Pat M.

MOM I TOLD YOU NOT TO EMAIL ME ON THIS ACCOUNT!!!! I’VE HEARD IT MOM! Yes I got the pictures love you.

-Kathy

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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